While sitting on the beach a few days ago an adorable, curly-headed little girl came bounding along the sand, walked directly up to me, put her hands on my knees and asked, ¨What´s your name?¨ in a very adult-like spanish. I was surprised to learn as our conversation progressed that she is only 4 years old. When I told her that I was from the United States she simply explained that she was born there and would like to go back when she is older. Her mother was sitting a little ways away, under a palapa with some other ladies. They motioned for me to join them, so Stephanie, the precocious 4 year old, and I walked over to sit and chat with the gals sipping cokes in the heat of the day. They were curious about me, asking a variety of questions, until one by one they had to go, leaving only Stephanie, her mother Diana and myself.
Diana is a laid back, soft-spoken women with tired eyes. I was surprised to learn that Stephanie is her only daughter, as most women have at least 3, some as many as 10 in this area. I was also surprised that she had Stephanie when she was 23, an above average age (15 is the legal age for marrying and many in this area do, and lots have kids as early as 16). I asked her about having Stephanie in the U.S. and she slowly told me her story, all the while casting loving eyes on her beautiful daughter playing in the sand.
While it has been common throughout our travels in Mexico to meet children who were born in the U.S., it has been less common in these parts. Many people have shared their stories about illegally crossing the border and they never cease to amaze me. Generally it costs them an extremely large sum, considering wages here, and often involves a 3-day walk through the desert with no food and very little water. Some have crossed over crammed in car trunks with four others, praying they won´t be discovered. Others have even made the journey with children in tow. While all the stories are intense, none have astounded me as much as Diana´s.
Essentially, the father of Stephanie didn´t take responsibility, leaving Diana a pregnant, single woman in Mexico and consequentially, a child with a very challenging future. Determined to create opportunity for her child, Diana scrounged up enough money (presumably relying on family) to pay for the travel to the border and to pay for the coyote (the person who guides illegals across the border).
By the time she made it there she was 7 months pregnant. Her first attempt failed, as it was cold and sleeting and she fell during the crossing. Concerned that the fall had hurt her baby she returned to the Mexico side to have an examination. Having discovered that the baby was fine, she attemped once more. This time she successfully completed the 3 day journey across the desert, all while 7 months pregnant, with no food and a small amount of water. Stephanie was born on American soil and lived her first two years in the states. I didn´t ask if they were deported and Diana didn´t volunteer that information. At the end of her story, Diana looked up and asked again, ¨How old are you?¨. Hearing that I am only 1 year older than her, she sighed, smiled and said, ¨I feel so much older than 27.¨
Diana explained to me that Stephanie is both a child and a friend and goes everywhere with her. When I asked her if she wanted to have any more children she responded, no, that she wanted to do everything she could to see that this child has a good life. Stephanie is now learning Nagua, the regional language, Spanish and as much English as she can come into contact with. The three of us practiced counting in English together and they attempted to share some Nagua with me. Diana wishes she could send Stephanie to the U.S. for school but it would involve another illegal entry for her and she expressed concern about the present dangers on the border. Then, casually, she got up, telling Stephanie it was time to go, and said, ¨It was nice to meet you.¨ Stephanie flashed a big smile and waved her hand as she trailed behind her mother, curls bouncing.
